Tag: workplace mental health

A = Acceptance – 10 Keys to Happier Living: Christine Hamilton, HWBI Ninja

Some practical self-care steps for living in the “New Normal” by applying Acceptance and Commitment Theory (ACT).

I was drawn to an on-line lecture covering the practical steps I, and others, could consider putting into practice in order to personally deal more effectively with the unprecedented challenges of “Lockdown” and other Covid impacts. Dr Russ Harris, a key proponent of ACT, has produced an acronym – FACE COVID to help us remember what we can do when we become suddenly aware of excessive anxiety within ourselves or others. (In such times it is, of course, an entirely rational reaction to feel concern and anxiety).

When I first heard about ACT, I thought it sounded a bit “hippyish” which was both appealing and, I thought, impractical for busy modern lives- “who realistically has time to mindful?”.  And I wondered if “Acceptance” was just another word for “let yourself off the hook of striving for high performance” i.e. it was for wimps. I have subsequently realised that ACT offers the potential for me and my coachees to accept our humanity and to commit to moving towards more meaningful lives. I found the webinar, presented by Associate Professor Nuno Ferreira, of Nicosia University, insightful and it energised me to share his and Russ Harris’ work.  So I’ve outlined a definition of ACT and the steps advocated and you can make your own mind up.
( I have listed additional links and resources should anyone want to read more about the origins and evidence around ACT).

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a coaching and therapy approach which encourages people to make progress through the development of psychological flexibility.  It  invites people to: open up to unpleasant feelings; to learn not to overreact to them or to  try to eliminate them (by overindulging in unhealthy/unproductive behaviours); to learn not to avoid situations where such feelings are invoked; and instead to embrace their thoughts and feelings rather than fighting or feeling guilty for them.  The approach combines mindfulness skills with the practice of self-acceptance.   It helps people to be present with, and accept, what life brings them and to planfully “move toward valued behaviours”.

FACE COVID

 = Focus on what you can control                      = Committed action

= Acknowledge your thoughts and feelings  = Opening up 

= Come back into your body                               = Values

= Engage in what you are doing                         = Identify resources

                                                                                         = Disinfect Distance

The Overall key is indeed to Focus on:

  • What you can actually control? 
  • How you can choose to behave?     Right here, right now ? 
  • And when anxiety gets too much? When you can’t stop worrying? When things just feel so out of control? What actions you can take?

Notes and references

Steven C. Hayes developed Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in 1982 in order to create a mixed approach which integrates both cognitive and behavioural therapy. 

A leading author and teacher of ACT is Dr Russ Harris see https://www.actmindfully.com.au/ and his 5 minute video on FACE COVID https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmvNCdpHUYM

HWBInspiration co-founders, Su & Claire, are grateful to our Associate HWBI Ninjas for sharing their knowledge, skill and insights.

R = Relating:  Reaching out and fostering relationships with others at work is good for our wellbeing.

R = Relating: Reaching out and fostering relationships with others at work is good for our wellbeing.

This blog, written by our co-founder Su, is part of a series where our HWBInspiration team reflect on The 10 Keys to Happier Living. Each Key helps to boost our health and wellbeing. Su, co-founder of HWBInspiration shares her thoughts on the importance of work relationships.

What comes to mind when you think about ‘best friends’?  For me, it’s thinking back to school days when I was in the ‘4th Year’ of junior school.  I was 11, not quite at senior school and my best friend at the time was Juliet.  We would go off in a pair (I wasn’t keen on 3’s) and have ‘our time’ together, playing various games, using our imaginations, sharing stories, talking about what we did the night before, acting out different make believe scenarios and sharing what we were looking forward to next week.  As a child of the 70’s (Generation X), quite a lot of our conversations revolved around:

  • Who we liked best – The Osmond’s or Jackson 5?
  • What we had read in ‘Jackie’ or ‘My Guy’
  • What we were allowed to watch on TV – Sweeny, Star Trek, Starsky and Hutch
  • What shoes we wanted – platforms or heels
  • What lessons we liked – English, PE, history, science (I was never one for maths)
  • How were we going to get our homework in on time when it was such a boring task?
  • What it would be like in ‘senior school’?
  • All the things we would ‘put right’ when we were ‘in charge’

In my formative years, I wasn’t aware of how important it was to have a sense of belonging, to have a network of trusted friends, a set of strong family relationships and people that I could turn to for support when things weren’t going well.  If anything, I took it all for granted.  I now appreciate how fortunate I was growing up. 

As I’ve got older, with more life experience, I am more conscious and aware of how important relationships are to us as human beings in helping us to develop, grow and survive.  Don’t get me wrong, I had my fair share of ‘playground’ disagreements and that still continues now, although I managed them better (most of the time).  I do notice that during lock down my ‘dark side’ or overplayed strengths need more attention and have a trusted friend who will feedback on that.

Friendships in the World of Work

I enjoy the company of others, I like to connect as it helps me to think, build on ideas and I get a lot of personal satisfaction from spending time with others.  And I think I’m generally good at fostering positive relationships. 

I have often heard colleagues and peers say ‘I spend more time with my work colleagues than I do with my family and friends’.  Which poses an interesting dilemma for all of us.  I was ‘schooled’ to believe, like many, that the world of work and the world outside work needed to be kept separate.  This poses real dilemma’s as it can sometimes be difficult to maintain those boundaries and, in the past, I found myself crossing this ‘imaginary’ line. 

An article by Gallup (2018) explores the issue of work friendships in more depth and discovered that the question, ‘Do you have a best friend at work?’ had the strongest reactions from their clients for number of reasons e.g. an expectation that you leave your non work self at the door, sharing ‘chit chat’ and lunch breaks was detrimental to productivity etc.  Interestingly, what they found was that having a ‘best friend at work’ leads to better performance.  The data from their database suggested that 2 out of 10 U.S. employees strongly agree that they have a best friend at work.  They hypothesis that if that ratio moved to 6 out of 10, organisations could see fewer safety incidents, more engaged customers, more engaged staff and higher profits.

The benefits of a business buddy

Whilst it is important to manage boundaries in the workplace, especially in relation to accountability and performance, how much better for all of us if we opened ourselves up to the legitimacy of friendship at work.  I can speak from personal experience.  The person I enjoy working with the most, has over the years become not only my best work friend, also one of my very few personal best friends.  That doesn’t mean it gets too cosy or that we don’t challenge each other.  If anything, it’s the opposite.  We can truly:

  • Be open and honest,
  • Challenge and respect each other’s perspectives,
  • Disagree without falling out,
  • Appreciate and play to our strengths,
  • Hold each other up when the other is struggling,
  • Let off steam and not feel judged.

It’s not a walk in the park, we work at it and I’m all the better for my ‘best friend’ at work relationship.  You know who you are and THANK YOU!!  I’m a better person (mostly).

What’s your experience?

Why We Need Best Friends at Work Mann. A, 2018 https://www.gallup.com/workplace/236213/why-need-best-friends-work.aspx

HWBInspiration co-founders, Su & Claire, are grateful to our Associate HWBI Ninjas for sharing their knowledge, skill and insights.

Dancing in the Rain; International Women’s Day & Mental Wellbeing – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

Dancing in the Rain; International Women’s Day & Mental Wellbeing – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

This year’s International Women’s day focused on “An equal world is an enabled world”. 

I was delighted to be invited to speak about Anxiety and Recovery at Manchester’s Cross Government International Women’s day event on 6th March which focussed on health and wellbeing.  It was a privilege and an honour to hear from so many inspirational women. These included Daisy Smith, Head of Performance Analysis and Modelling at Highways England, Alison McKenzie-Folan CEO of Wigan Council, Tessa Lewis, GP and NICE fellow and Rachel Copley, Health Transformation Team Leader at DWP.  

Thank you to all the amazing women who attended the event and to everyone including Daisy for your feedback, it has given me the courage to write my next blog… so here goes

#IWD2020 #eachforequal

Learning to dance in the rain

13.9% of the population will experience an anxiety disorder at any given time, Women are twice as likely to be diagnosed with anxiety disorders than men (Mental Health First Aid England).

However, recovery from mental illness is possible and very likely. Recovery means different things to different people. Nigel Henderson, President of Mental Health Europe’s notion of recovery personally resonated with me “It isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s learning to dance in the rain”. Recovery is much more than the absence of symptoms.

The mental health continuum can help us to understand this notion. Initially, people described the state of mental health as being on a continuum from mentally healthy to mental illness (medical language).  The favoured approach is to now think of two continua on a different axis.  The second axis (social language) can be described as minimum mental wellbeing/fitness to maximum mental wellbeing/fitness.

Image courtesy of togethertolive.ca

This model allows for people who have a diagnosable mental illness and who are coping well with the illness (for example they may have good coping strategies, a good medication regime, supportive friends etc) to have positive mental health. They have “learned to dance in the rain”.

There are many factors that can influence the recovery journey including:

  • Availability and access to treatments such as medication or psychological interventions
  • Having supportive social networks (colleagues, family, friends)
  • Playing a meaningful role in society (for example through education or employment opportunities)
  • Lifestyle (including eating well, exercise and sleep)
  • Stability (including home and financial)
  • Acceptance and control (focussing on what you can do)

Some other important features of the recovery journey can be described by the acronym CHIME (connectedness, hope and optimism, identity, meaning and purpose and empowerment). 

I like to think of my own recovery as a journey because it isn’t for me a linear process, I have had setbacks and I honestly don’t know when and if I will reach a destination. However, through increasing my knowledge of mental health and wellbeing and understanding of myself I  too have  “learned to dance in the rain”.  This has involved many of the factors listed above including:

  • Professional support – my GP has been amazing; she has given me choice and control over my treatments acting as a professional partner in my recovery journey.
  • A caring network of family and friends – who have increased their own awareness and understanding of mental health and walked beside me on my journey. They have helped me to set new goals and aspirations and pursue them.
  • Redefining my goals and aspirations which includes writing and talking about mental health and wellbeing which has given me a purpose and a new drive and passion 
  • Lifestyle changes – including exercise and eating healthier and growing new skills to support my wellbeing
  • Control – which has been fundamental to my recovery. Control over my treatment, control over finding ways to help myself and my wellbeing (CBT has been instrumental) and control over how and when I choose to work which enables me to cope with the symptoms of anxiety. 

However other factors can impact on a person’s recovery journey.  Nearly 9 out of 10 people with mental health problems say that stigma and discrimination have a negative effect on their lives. People don’t recover in isolation, social inclusion (i.e. being involved with society)  is key and through increased understanding and discussion of mental health, we can help to reduce the inequalities experienced by those who have a mental illness. 

So, let’s make mental health everyone’s business and take personal responsibility to look after our own as well as the mental health of others #eachforequal

Want to find out more about anxiety, ideas around how to look after your own mental wellbeing, or how to raise awareness of mental health within your organisation here are some suggested links below to help you get started or to share with others:

Information about anxiety:

Your Mental wellbeing:

Workplace Mental Health and useful Resources to raise awareness:

Image courtesy of http://www.togethertolive.ca/mental-health-continuum

Time to talk – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

Time to talk – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

Thursday 6th February is ‘Time to Talk’ day, so it’s an excellent opportunity to choose to talk about mental health. Talking about mental health is really important because it has the power to change lives. There is a dedicated website with loads of great resources, hints and tips on how to start a conversation, which you can find here.

It’s essential that people make a personal choice about whether they talk about their mental health. I decided I would share my journey explaining how talking has helped me.

Here is a quick synopsis of my lived experience.  In essence, I was a successful leader working in Housing and Education until the age of 43, when I resigned due to severe anxiety which later developed into depression.  Talking has for me been a vital part of my continuing road to recovery. 

At my lowest times, I isolated myself from everyone, including family and friends, (which was very unlike me, I’m usually quite extravert and sociable) so my talking journey started with writing. I found keeping a diary of my feelings and experience strangely cathartic and therapeutic (I say ‘strangely’ because I had never written a diary, even as a teenager).  Writing helped me to clarify my thoughts and feelings and make a little bit of sense of the alien world in which I felt like I had entered. I didn’t realise it at the time, but I would later use my diary as the basis of sharing my lived experience with others… I will come on to this.

In some ways, I suppose writing helped me realise I needed more professional help to fully make sense of my new world (which I was increasingly becoming frustrated and resentful about).  In summary, my new world consisted of struggling to get out of bed, failing to wash my hair and put on my makeup (really not like me) and crying sporadically throughout the day. On better days taking the dog for a walk but then having a panic attack and having to quickly get home, unaware of the days and weeks that passed and panicking about when I will get better because I needed work and an income!  Yes, I needed a bit of help, so the next stage in my journey was talking to a counsellor.  The benefits of counselling are endless and can quite literally be life-saving.

Despite the emotions and pain I have gone through, counselling has helped me make sense of and accept my new world.  It has equipped me with the knowledge and skills to take back control of my feelings and emotions in a way that I can now live with my illness and navigate my new world. In reality, this has meant setting up my own business, slowly starting to take on some work and living my life again. The most important thing it has done is give me the confidence to re-engage with family and friends whom I missed dearly. Interestingly, it also gave me the courage to talk about my illness with them. Not only has this been beneficial for me (I feel accepted for simply being Lou) but it also helped them understand why I needed to shut myself away for a while and that, it didn’t mean I loved or cared for them any less. How they felt about me avoiding them was always something I struggled with.  I felt a massive sense of guilt about the impact I thought I was having on my loved ones and still did until recently when I was talking to someone about the impact mental health has on family and friends. I explained I wanted to write a blog about it because it shouldn’t be underestimated.  She said she loved the idea about a blog on the role of family and friends in supporting recovery (an interesting interpretation of what I was saying) as long as I don’t give myself a whole load of guilt about it (lightbulb moment!). She explained people who love you will simply want to help and walk beside you on your journey. Metaphorically, I realised that this equated for me to the little text or the weekly card I would receive, the phone call to my husband to ask how I was or the little presents I received. It was their way of letting me know that despite not being in each other’s company they were still all there walking beside me and I hadn’t offended them by my actions, they understood. I had never thought about it in this way and needless to say, it led to shelving my original blog idea and writing this one!

So after writing, talking to professionals, talking to my family and friends, (I also started to speak to people in the park while walking the dog) I found myself delivering my lived experience to complete strangers (maybe 25 or so people in a room). This led to blogging (you will see from the first one how much courage it took me to “talk to” LinkedIn).  As I get asked more often to share my lived experience, and as I write this post I have been reflecting “Why do I talk about one of the darkest and hardest times in my life with potentially 1000’s of others”?  Because, being honest, I find it helpful to talk, but also do it in the hope that my lived experience and blog provides hope for others. If my talking and writing can help just one other person to gain the courage they need to talk to someone about their mental health, then its totally worth it. 

Who looks out for the Senior Leaders and what can we do to support their Mental Health? – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

Who looks out for the Senior Leaders and what can we do to support their Mental Health? – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

This is the question that I have been asked several times and most recently at a Health and Wellbeing Event, where I shared my lived experience. When I started to consider this, I found quite a stark headline:

“Two-Thirds of business leaders have suffered from mental health conditions including anxiety, stress and depression with work often cited as a contributor to this” – Bupa 2018

Bupa’s study conducted with 1556 global business leaders found:

  • 58% of business leaders say that in their position it’s hard to talk about mental health
  • 1 in 4 people feel less support for mental health issues since becoming more senior
  • Sufferers fear that talking about mental health would affect perceptions of their capabilities and career prospects

So, who looks out for the Senior Leaders, and what can we do to support their Mental Health? I posed this same question at the start of the year to a prominent Professor and leader in wellbeing, and he too came to a similar conclusion. He found that there was literature that explores the impact of leaders on follower wellbeing. However, there was nothing that focuses on the support that is specific to leaders.  

While there appears to be an overwhelming lack of literature, I found some reference to:

  • Challenging perceptions around mental health and leadership
  • Ensuring there are services available to support senior people
  • Creating mentally healthy open workplace cultures where senior staff feel able to access support
  • Business leaders sharing their own experiences which can help to remove the stigma

It got me thinking about my own experience in an attempt to try and find some answers.

As you will know from my previous blogpost (https://www.hwbinspiration.com/lived-experience-blog-by-lou-harris/), I resigned from my job as a Managing Director. I didn’t realise or admit to it for a very long time, but I was suffering from severe anxiety and had been for about two years before resigning. The organisation I left had a clear commitment to mental health, visible leadership and support services that were accessible, fast and efficient and this created a culture of openness and acceptance which helped me find the courage to acknowledge I needed help and seek support. Despite the support I received (which was brilliant), I felt I could no longer continue working as a senior leader. I was absolutely exhausted. I felt unable to shoulder the responsibility that comes with a senior leadership role and unable to continue as a good leader should protecting the mental health and wellbeing of others when my own mental health needed more dedicated time and attention. 

So why did it take me so long to do something? I was reluctant first and foremost to acknowledge that I was struggling with my mental health and secondly to ask for help. Why was this? We will all have our reasons. For me (not justified) I felt like I had to wear an “I am doing great” badge constantly. I was the leader, and people looked to me for direction and support, I couldn’t possibly acknowledge I was struggling and ask for help because people would question my ability as a leader. So, I basically tried to hide the fact I was struggling. When I did finally acknowledge and seek support and take time out while the side effects of my medication subsided and returned to work, the response was quite overwhelming. My absence due to my mental health had not negatively impacted on people’s views of my ability as a leader; in fact, it almost seemed to encourage more open conversations with my team and colleagues. I believe this was because first and foremost, they saw me as a human being. 

So, is looking out and supporting senior manager any different to what we would do for anyone else in our organisations? I have concluded that the answer to this question based on my own experience is NO. I agree that it is essential to challenge perceptions around mental health and leadership, provide accessible services, and if leaders feel able and want to disclose it can have a tremendously positive impact on an organisations culture. The organisational culture was absolutely at the heart of giving me the courage as a senior leader to acknowledge I was struggling and seek support. As we know, it is leaders who create the culture of an organisation. And so, maybe we need to pay more considerable attention to the role of Boards? How often do Boards consider Mental Health and Wellbeing? What culture are they creating for the Senior Leadership team around mental health?

Similarly, I believe that colleagues and peers can play a vital role. We often work as senior leadership teams on some of the most challenging and wicked issues our organisations face, we come into regular contact, we share experiences, and this puts us in a great position to look out for one another. So, as Board members, leaders, colleagues, peers and human beings let’s look out for and support one another, as doing so could have a significant impact on our colleagues’ lives. 

Aspiration vs reality in workplace mental health – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

Aspiration vs reality in workplace mental health – guest blog by Lou Harris #HWBAssociateNinja

Thank you to everyone who supported my first ever blog, it has inspired me to continue to writing and sharing my journey in the hope will help others to reach out and seek support if they need it and encourage leaders and managers to take action around mental health.  I recently read a report by Business in the Community.  They found a gap between aspiration and reality for workplace mental health:

  • 58% of senior leaders and board members think their organisation supports its staff but:
  • 42% of employees with no managerial responsibility believe that their organisation supports its staff and:
  • 20% of employees feel that their manager is not concerned about their wellbeing (BITC Mental Health at work report 2018).

In my experience…

Having spent the last 16 years working as and alongside managers and leaders I have been reflecting on this and what it was that helped me when I was struggling with my mental health while in work and crucially came to the conclusion that leadership is absolutely key because it creates the workplace culture.  I personally:

  • Felt able to disclose and discuss my mental health with my manager and other senior leaders in the organisation (which being honest was slightly scary – but provided a firm basis of understanding and trust when I did need support)
  • Felt able (for a period of time) to manage my mental health through support that was easily accessible and available. Being able to access counselling within 2 days was one factor that enabled me to continue in my role for a further 6 months (My wait for Counselling from the NHS was 4 months for computer based and 8 months for face to face and this is not a criticism in anyway, I will always be grateful for the services and support I have received)
  • Retained my dignity and respect from the continued belief I received in me as a person

And this was created by leaders in the organisation.  Because when you have leaders:

  • who demonstrate time and commitment to wellbeing and mental health
  • who make themselves available and accessible to talk to about it
  • who lead and champion wellbeing and mental health initiatives
  • who by their own behaviours lead by example and show it is acceptable and more than that important that you have a work life balance
  • who ensure that there is a focus on prevention and support is available 
  • who are aware of warning signs, confident to talk about mental health and aware of and can access organisational support available
  • who genuinely care because they ask you how you are doing and listen to you

…. it makes a huge difference

….it creates a culture of openness, acceptance and trust. 

This may not come easy to some of us and if I am being honest it didn’t to me (I wasn’t great at the work life balance – my own decision, drive and perfectionism) …. that is why I believe it’s so important that we:

  • Increase awareness and understanding of mental health across the whole organisation (not just senior leaders and boards)
  • Help develop leaders and managers confidence to be able to have discussions about Mental Health

So, on National Stress Awareness day, what can you commit to doing in your organisation to close the gap between aspiration and reality?